Long time, no see, my friend.

I'm feeling melancholic today, and I had this sudden feeling to spill my guts. And since I can't talk to someone, I decided to visit my blog. It's been gathering a bit of dust already. Okay, a lot. But I'm glad to see that some--if not most--of my Tabulas friends are still loyal to their own journals. I felt a sense of homecoming.

So, what's new?

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I'm getting married in two months' time. *hurrah!* It's to the same guy that took up most of my blog pages for the past years. We've been engaged since June. Can't hardly wait.

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Hurtful truth or comforting lie.

If it were told to me, I'd pick the hurtful truth. For me, a lie is a lie no matter what. You confront the truth, then you decide what is to be done after. I'd rather take on Life like that than be faced with a bunch of sugar-coated lies. At least I'll know where I stand.

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My grandma from my dad's side passed away just last night from stroke. Even though we aren't that close--I only see her once a year--it was a sad thing to hear. I was thinking before that even if my dad weren't able to see me on my wedding day, at least his mom would be present. Kinda like a proxy to the other branch of the family. But now, they're together Up there. My prayers are with her.

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It's nice to look back on my past entries and reminisce on things that I've already forgotten.

Till next time.

 

 

I had a dream last night. I was driving a Volvo on a normal evening after work. I got out somewhere for an unknown and still forgotten reason. I didn't lock the doors for some reason too. The next thing I saw--or didn't see--was the Volvo. The most probable reason is that it was stolen by somebody, but the most obvious thing was that it wasn't there where I left it anymore. All my things were inside--my laptop, my bag, cellphones, ATM cards, cash. I was close to crying already. And that was the point when I woke up.

 

I was uneasy after that, because I couldn't help but feel that the dream meant something more than it should--that I might lose something valuable to me if I don't take care of it the way it should be.

 

But who takes care of me? What I just wanted to feel is that I'm irreplaceable to somebody, just as that somebody is irreplaceable to me.

 

Sino nga ba ako?

I lied to you. Can you forgive me?

 

 

 

He went to Chicago for work already. Though it's just for one month, I thought I wouldn't cry, because I didn't when we got to the airport. But then, things have their own way of happening; when I got home and was alone in my room already, after having unpacked his birthday gift for me (my birthday is still a month away)--an iPod Video Classic, 80GB--I cried. That's when I felt it.

I cried more when I listened to the single mp3 that was already in the iPod--Tony Bennett's The Way You Look Tonight.

Thank God for YM and online video calls.